Quitting smoking

Not an easy task.

Luckily I have my trusty vape to help me through. 

I will vouche for vaping. It has saved me money and aggravation to no end. Also, it's much healthier than you'd think. A lot of people say it's worse than smoking but I don't see how. Compared to a cigarette, the vape has less chemicals and is practically odourless vapor. 

How can you not try it?
 
 

The Oscars

Let's face it. #OscarsSoWhite is such a cop out. Chris Rock is doing an amazing job of hosting. Is it racist? Very. 

In my opinion, it's black people making the separation between us. White people don't give a shit. To have Chris Rock host was an amazing choice because he brought to light the real problem with #OscarsSoWhite and why it's actually a bunch of bullshit created by black actors who think that we think they aren't good enough. Besides, he did it with hilarity. 

Mad Max won six Oscars, more than any other movie even had the chance to win. Leonardo DiCaprio finally won himself an Oscar! 

All in all, the Oscars were a great watch.

 

What You Should be Focusing on

I sit behind my computer as per usual on this most auspicious of days,and I am hit with some reality. There are so many things to think about. Bills, kids, whether or not you remembered to lock your door this morning. Do you have milk in the house? Better grab another bag just in case. Is today Thursday? I can't remember. 

The feeling you get from all of this junk swirling around your head is called anxiety. It is to me, anyway. It's rough to think that every day everyone is dealing with a million things and you would never know. This is why I've made an unorthodox, yet brilliant(kind of) list of things I should be focusing on this year. If it isn't on my list, I try not to worry too much about it. 

We will start off with this: 

Personal Happiness

First and foremost, my personal happiness will come first. If one is not happy, one must change that. I can't tell you the amount of times I've cried over spilled milk, my chicken didn't turn out the way it should have! So I've decided to put a halt to over working my brain over things I cannot change. If you do not contribute to your own personal happiness, how can you expect others to do so?

What is it that makes you happy? For me it's fresh air, a good Netflix movie, snuggles with the babe. Freedom, energy, yoga, food. I incorporate all of this into my daily life, including writing this blog, and I must say, I am happier for it. 

Do what makes you happy, no matter what. It's not up to other people, as I've said before, the world owes you nothing. You owe yourself everything and more. Personal fulfilment comes from within, not from what is around you.

Finances

I know, I know. Groan and mumble. Money isn't everything, blah blah. To me, I feel as though having a good grip on my wealth means happiness. Knowing my bills are paid, and I have food in the fridge, that there's enough left over to go to dinner and maybe save a little. I've said once or twice in previous blogs that I'm not fantastic with saving money, I use the "jar" method. I work with cash and then save what is left over after giving both myself and hubby an allowance. 

Find what works for you. If it's ten dollars a week for the next year, save it. you'll have much more than you started with. 

Take Pleasure in Pleasure

When I was young, I didn't need to remind myself to have fun at the fair, or to enjoy that tiny little road trip to the local Denny's. I didn't need to remind myself to be excited at Christmas, or to enjoy that kiss from Grandma. Nowadays I find myself worrying more about how much the fair cost me, or how much gas we used up going to hike in the Pinery National Park. I need to breathe, learn to love these little things and not stress so much over the small details.

Take Pride in the Things You Do Well

This has always been a bit of a struggle for me. I'm one heck of a good cook but I'll never openly admit it. I might be great at a variety of things, I just don't know. Making dinner is one of my favourite hobbies, I will learn to take more pride in that. As a person, you need to identify and focus in on what makes you, well, you. 

Forgotten.

It is late.

I can't sleep.

And I hate to say

I'm in pretty deep.

2 AM dreaming

of 3 AM dreams,

I'll never understand

what this insomnia means.

I'm tired, but yet I remain awake. My mind is going a mile a minute and I can't stop it. All I want is to be someone they can be proud of, someone who means something. I started my website www.theCanadiancrab.wix.com/littletalks and I'm hoping that'll help get a bit of buzz about the advice column I plan on starting. You will be able to find the advice column at that website as well as send in any questions you may have through that website. I look forward to hearing from all of you!

Other People's Lives

Other people's lives are more interesting than mine

I don't know how to explain myself half the time. My life is boring. Wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't confined to the house, full of metal and braces. But, alas, here I am. Playing the Sims 4 and living vicariously through the lives of electronic people. 

10 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Turned 25

          Last year I turned 25. It was a huge eye-opener for me. I quickly realized that I was now an adult.I had to do adult things, I had to "act my age". How was I supposed to do that when I've never been this old before?
There are ten things I really wish I knew before I turned 25. These things are not miniscule, they are life-altering. To me they were a large plethora of reality that hit me like a brick wall. I woke up one morning and found out so many things at once it was like a euphoria of emotions.
Following are the ten things I wish I knew before turning 25.
1. Money Doesn't Grow on Trees
This is somewhat of a reality-check for me. I had to learn that in order to have nice things, you had to work for them. It took a lot for me to come to terms with the fact that nothing comes for free, it requires dedication
2. Education is Important, to an Extent
There, I said it. To an EXTENT. Yes, education is important. Please, be smart enough to do simple maths, and read a book once in a while. Educate YOURSELF. Never stop learning. It's not just all-nighters and grinding down into textbooks trying to make something of yourself. It's in your skills, what you're good at, and you should never be ashamed of your education level.
3. Don't Settle for Less than You Deserve
Oh, how I wish I knew this when I was younger. Then again, do any of us know what we deserve or are worth when we are young? If I could tell my younger self one thing, it would be that I was worth so much more than I allowed myself to be back then.
4. Don't Rush Life
Everything will come in time, young me. Take the time to smell the roses, as they say. Slow down. Breathe. It's all going to be okay one day and you'll look back and wish it all hadn't gone by so quickly. You'll never get that time back, take it all in.
5. There is Such a Thing as Fate
I am a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. Fate exists, it's all around you. You fall over in the grocery store and that cute guy helps you up, or you just so happen to be in the same bar as the pretty waitress you've had the hots for awhile and she's giving you the eye. Everything you do, everyone you meet, contributes to your fate.
6. It's a Great Thing to Save Money
Oh, if I only knew this before. I can barely save now, thanks to my spending habits. Thank you, young me, for never learning the value of a dollar. I have learned to keep a jar. Any cash I receive ends up in said jar, and remains untouched. That is just one way I try to save. The jar is currently empty. Thank you, Young me.
7. Take Joy in the Little Things
This statement I will yell from the rooftops. Please, enjoy every single little thing, every miniscule moment. The world is at your fingers, young one. The good, the bad, the ugly. Every moment is a blessing in disguise. You never know when something will change. When your life will topsy-turvy and you'll lose everything. You never know when those little things will be all you have left, so appreciate them now.
8. Grab Every Opportunity
I am an opportunist. I grasp life by the (a-hem!) nevermind, and I roll with it. You can't have opportunity without risk. That's all part of the fun! When I was younger, I was always afraid to take a risk, (what if I failed?). Failure doesn't scare me as much anymore, and I'm all for taking risks and taking names. You never know where an opportunity will take you in the end, so grasp them while they are there, it's all part of the ride.
9. Young Love is Still Love
How do I know this? I look back on my past and there are still people I love to this day. They know who they are too. There are three specific ones that stand out in my head, and the funny thing is, they weren't ex-boyfriends. I loved these people and they loved me. Looking back, I see how I went with the wrong people, how I ended up with people who didn't deserve me. The ones that stood by the sidelines and now are happy with others as I am happy with mine, and we remain friends.
10. Don't Forget Whose Legs You're On
The world owes you nothing. No one owes anyone anything. It's the harshest reality of them all. Only you can change your world.

Turning 25 changed my life. I know I'm still young, but I have had a lot of time to think. I've got it all(most).

What You're Missing

Hold On.

What ARE you missing?

LIFE.

While you're staring at your phone, the world is passing you by. While you're playing Candy Crush on your tablet, someone is begging for your attention. While your eyes are glued to a television, the world is waiting. Patiently, and ever so quiet.

There is a whole cornucopia of adventure just waiting for you to explore it, to taste it. Try a new restaurant, go for a hike, breathe in the crisp air of life. 

Day after day you sit there, transfixed on one device or another, ignoring what is around you. When you forget about the reality of life, and disappear into a world of gossip and fashion and games, you lose a part of yourself. 

You need to pull yourself from these things and remember who is around you, your partner, your child, your family. 

You need to remember what is around you. 

Life.

All around you there are things to do, especially here in London, Ontario. A lot of people fall into the "it's a small city, there's nothing to do" phase, just sitting on their couches, reading my blog. Not that I mind, I enjoy writing and there would be no reason for me to do so had you not chosen to read. Let me encourage you though, explore this grand city of ours and see it for the beauty it has.

The downtown core has plenty of tiny little pawn shops and little pubs, not to mention the prosperous Covenant Garden Marketplace. The buildings are beautiful, and old. 

Fancy a walk? Victoria Park is a gorgeous place, with Williams cafe right next door, grab a hot chocolate and enjoy the winter. The park also holds ice skating during the snowy season, with skate rentals available. 

Like to shop? There are two major malls here, the White Oaks in the Southern part of the city and Masonville in the North. Each mall is very different from the other, make a day and check out both!

See a movie. Any random movie. Go alone or bring a friend. There are a variety of theatres in London, one of them being the SilverCity in Masonville. There's even an arts theatre here, right in the heart of our downtown centre. 

Literally do anything except sit where you are, and watch the world pass you by. Get up and enjoy the feeling of the earth unfolding around you.  Watch the opportunities flow like leaves in an autumn breeze. 

Being Broken

Do you know what it's like?

Being broken?

It started with just a little ice

and a little fracture in my left knee from a previous fall. 

I was walking out to my car on January 16th, 2016 to go to Walmart for some coconut oil ( a girl needs shiny healthy hair). Luckily I was walking with Michael, my better half. Next thing I know, I'm writhing on the ground in pain. 

The ambulance came and took me to the hospital, the paramedics had to cut my clothes off to get to my injuries. I had dislocated my elbow, broken my wrist, and broken my left kneecap in half. 

The first few days in the hospital are a blur, all I really know is that this happened:

I wish they would have just salted the drive like they were supposed to. I had surgery on my knee and my wrist now. They look like this:

I was in a wheelchair for the first couple of weeks, I'm only just getting around now on my own two feet. There's a lot of recovery still to go. 

I have an appointment today with my physiotherapist for my wrist, hopefully I'm doing better than expected and this splint can come off soon. 

I will continue to update everyone via this blog. 

At least now I have time to write ☺️
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

Real-ationship

 How to Build a Successful Relationship

What makes a successful relationship? You know the kind I'm talking about. When you're holding hands walking down the street, and nuzzling noses. Buying each other random gifts, claiming you NEVER argue. 

Most people can state that these sorts of things in a relationship are not real, not true--unhealthy, even. I'm here to tell you that they are real, they do exist.

How can I be so sure? You huff, you puff, you ask. I'm sure because I'm in one of those real-ationships. You see, the keys to building a successful relationship are: Communication, Understanding, and Respect. 

Communication plays a huge part in any relationship, no one is a mind reader and you really can't expect your partner to be. How are they supposed to know anything about you if you don't ask questions? If you're having problems in this area, you should sit down with your partner and exercise these concerns. State how you feel calmly and collectively without any blame on either you or your partner, and encourage them to do the same. 

This isn't to say any relationship goes without fault, but the way you communicate with each other plays a large part in the way your disagreements turn into constructive discussions. If you are not willing to communicate openly, then there is no hope for the relationship. 

Which leads me to my next point; Understanding. In order to communicate, one must first understand. You need to take the time to really listen to what the other is saying and try your best to have an open mind to their concerns as well. Even if what they are saying does not coincide with your expectations, your best route is to maintain a calm sense of understanding. Put yourself in their shoes, and if you can see their point of view. 

Just attempting to understand what one another is feeling shows that you care, and are trying. It shows that you want the relationship to work, and that you want to know what one another is feeling. It makes your partner feel safe and secure. 

The third is, Respect. You must respect your partner, always. There should be a feeling of mutual compassion between the two of you. What works for one must work for the other. A relationship cannot work without respect. It is what stops you from hurting one another's feelings. It stops you from placing hands on one another and from exchanging words you may or may not mean.

These three things: Communication, Understanding, and Respect; work hand in hand to create a loving and working real-ationship. If you can find a way to make these three key points happen in your relationship, things will go a lot smoother.

A lot of couples today lack these key points and end up in exuberant arguments, tears and eventually, an end. There's another side as well. They lack these key elements and end up in silence, walking around on eggshells, doing their best to avoid one another until the love that got them together in the first place dissipates. 

Build it, people. Build Communication; sit down and talk calmly.

Build it. Build Understanding; Try to see things from your partner's point of view.

Build it. Build Respect; Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself.

Together you can build a real-ationship.