My mother, to be exact.
I don't wish to bad-mouth her, I do love my mum. I just read a blog about toxic parents, mothers specifically. It's brought me to realize I have one of those toxic relationships with my mother.
It's difficult to live with a parent who has so many issues of their own. I've dealt with things like attempted suicide, and fibromyalgia, bi polar, among many others. I've seen my mother go through all this and more.
Don't get me wrong, I had a roof over my head and food in my stomach, she never hit me. It was, however, traumatizing. Nowadays my mother is a handful. She over exaggerates. She lies. She makes everything much more dramatic than it needs to be.
I do what every good daughter should do, I love her through everything she's put me through. I am there for her when she needs me, although she'd say otherwise.
That was the point of the article I read. That they think you're responsible for their happiness, that it's your job as a daughter or son to keep them above water. It's toxic. They don't respect your boundaries, which is more than true in my case. I guess she could be much worse, but the times I've sat and cried because she's the way she is I can't count.
It's not fair, I hope this article does not offend her. That shouldn't be a fear of mine. I shouldn't be afraid of hurting her feelings. I can't be scared to tell her the truth anymore. There's times when she's a child, and I'm the adult. A lot of people say I should cut her off.
The problem is, I can't. She's my mother, I love her. As I should.
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