Real-ationship

 How to Build a Successful Relationship

What makes a successful relationship? You know the kind I'm talking about. When you're holding hands walking down the street, and nuzzling noses. Buying each other random gifts, claiming you NEVER argue. 

Most people can state that these sorts of things in a relationship are not real, not true--unhealthy, even. I'm here to tell you that they are real, they do exist.

How can I be so sure? You huff, you puff, you ask. I'm sure because I'm in one of those real-ationships. You see, the keys to building a successful relationship are: Communication, Understanding, and Respect. 

Communication plays a huge part in any relationship, no one is a mind reader and you really can't expect your partner to be. How are they supposed to know anything about you if you don't ask questions? If you're having problems in this area, you should sit down with your partner and exercise these concerns. State how you feel calmly and collectively without any blame on either you or your partner, and encourage them to do the same. 

This isn't to say any relationship goes without fault, but the way you communicate with each other plays a large part in the way your disagreements turn into constructive discussions. If you are not willing to communicate openly, then there is no hope for the relationship. 

Which leads me to my next point; Understanding. In order to communicate, one must first understand. You need to take the time to really listen to what the other is saying and try your best to have an open mind to their concerns as well. Even if what they are saying does not coincide with your expectations, your best route is to maintain a calm sense of understanding. Put yourself in their shoes, and if you can see their point of view. 

Just attempting to understand what one another is feeling shows that you care, and are trying. It shows that you want the relationship to work, and that you want to know what one another is feeling. It makes your partner feel safe and secure. 

The third is, Respect. You must respect your partner, always. There should be a feeling of mutual compassion between the two of you. What works for one must work for the other. A relationship cannot work without respect. It is what stops you from hurting one another's feelings. It stops you from placing hands on one another and from exchanging words you may or may not mean.

These three things: Communication, Understanding, and Respect; work hand in hand to create a loving and working real-ationship. If you can find a way to make these three key points happen in your relationship, things will go a lot smoother.

A lot of couples today lack these key points and end up in exuberant arguments, tears and eventually, an end. There's another side as well. They lack these key elements and end up in silence, walking around on eggshells, doing their best to avoid one another until the love that got them together in the first place dissipates. 

Build it, people. Build Communication; sit down and talk calmly.

Build it. Build Understanding; Try to see things from your partner's point of view.

Build it. Build Respect; Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself.

Together you can build a real-ationship.